10 Things You Didn’t Know About Tellulah Darling
1) I am too lazy to learn songs properly, choosing instead to just fit whatever word seems closest to the phonetic sound I hear. This means that nothing I sing makes any logical sense. However, they are all wildly creative. Every once in a while I actually figure out what the words are supposed to be and realize how much sense the song now makes. What’s funny is that there are certain songs I’m suck in a perpetual loop with. I learn what they are, promptly forget and go back to my nonsense, and then have that deja vu moment when I understand them again. Maybe I was dropped on my head as a child.
2) I love to travel but hate flying. As a result, I spent much of my life gripping the arms of my airplane seat while whispering “please don’t fall” for hours on end. Happily, my doctor informed me a couple years ago (while staring at me like I was an idiot upon hearing how I coped) that since my way didn’t work, I might want to try drugs. Miracles of modern science, indeed!
3) Speaking of travel–the first time I went to Italy, I was 15 yrs old. We were in Heathrow waiting for our flight to Rome and I’d fallen asleep stretched out across the chairs at the departure area. I woke up to the sight of the Italian National Football (Soccer) team seated around me. Even at that tender age, I was partial to that particular flavour of man candy. So I shot up and might have tried to shove my little brother under a seat in an attempt to look like a worldly solo traveller. Yeah, right. I wish you all a similar wake up call with *insert group of hot men of your choice*.
4) I was a professional screenwriter for 12 years. Crazy things happen in writers’ rooms. On one of my favourite shows to work on, the showrunner and I plotted out the entire season arc’s battle using Smurfs. This was for a kids’ show. We’d renamed them with our characters’ names and did their voices and everything. On another, not a kids’ show, there was an actual meeting to discuss the star’s wife’s Playboy photos. There can be this intimidating mystique around film and television. Don’t believe any of it.
5) I forget that my husband is one of my followers on Twitter. This leads to a lot of head shaking when I’ve been a bit too vigorous discussing hot guys – fictional or otherwise and steamy reads. I try to push the excuse that it’s simply ways of interacting with social media friends and readers. I think I’ve gotten away with it but I’m not sure because I am no longer able to make eye contact with him.
6) I hold a Masters’ Degree in Film Theory. Yes, you read that right. In watching movies. Okay, and criticizing them. Possibly the most useless degree known to mankind. Not only that, I did my Master’s thesis on Gender and Spectatorship in the animation of Chuck Jones. Which means that I watched Bugs Bunny Cartoons for two years. My family despaired. They used to lie and say I was studying journalism. I share this with you so that if your family gives you any grief about your area of study, you can use me as an example of how it could be so much worse. You’re welcome.
7) I think that the right shade of lipstick and a great head of hair can be a woman’s finest accessory. Who’s with me here?
8) I think the world needs more choreography. I have a constant soundtrack in my head and like to tap dance my way through the day. Which in my head comes off like a brilliant Gene Kelly-esque routine. I take no responsibility for how it looks in reality. Obviously, you all just need to see things in my special way.
9) I love my Kindle because it allows me to read my steamy romances to my heart’s content without the constant judging I get from haters who obviously are down on love. I’ve found that if I nod my head sagely whilst reading, people think I’m engrossed in some deep literary classic and perhaps feel bad for not reading such a weighty tome themselves. I feel no guilt for this. I’ve had too many years of snotty reactions to all the genre reading I’ve done.
10) Since I write romantic comedies, I’ll share a couple of my favs with you. Book: Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie. This is the smexiest book around. (Ha – autocorrect wanted it to be the smelliest book around.) Film: When Harry Met Sally and The Princess Bride. Don’t make me choose. It could get ugly.
If anyone wants to chat books, romcom or otherwise, let’s friendvite on Goodreads or email me on my site www.tellulahdarling.com.
nounSassy girls. Swoony boys. What could go wrong?1. YA romantic comedy author because her first kiss sucked and she’s compensating.
2. Alter ego of former screenwriter.
3. Sassy minx.Writes about: where love meets comedy. Awkwardness ensues.
Tellulah Darling is a firm believer that some of the best stories happen when love meets comedy. Which is why she has so much fun writing YA romantic comedy books. Her books span contemporary, teen fantasy romance, and YA Greek mythology, and range from stand alones to series. For Tellulah, teen romance is the most passionate, intense, and awkward there is – a comedy goldmine. Plus smart, mouthy, teen girls rock.
by Tellulah Darling
(The Blooming Goddess Trilogy #1)
Publication date: April 1st 2013
Genres: Fantasy, Mythology, Young Adult
Sixteen-year-old Sophie Bloom wishes she’d been taught the following:
a) Bad boy’s presence (TrOuBlE) + teen girl’s brain (DraMa) = TrAuMa (Highly unstable and very volatile.)
b) The Genus Greekulum Godissimus is notable for three traits: 1) awesome abilities, 2) grudges, and 3) hook-ups, break-ups, and in-fighting that puts cable to shame.
Prior to the Halloween dance, Sophie figures her worst problems involve adolescent theatrics, bitchy teen yoga girls, and being on probation at her boarding school for mouthy behaviour. Then she meets bad boy Kai and gets the kiss that rocks her world.
This breath stealing lip lock reawakens Sophie’s true identity: Persephone, Goddess of Spring. She’s key to saving humanity in the war between the Underworld and Olympus, target numero uno of Hades and Zeus, and totally screwed.
Plus there’s also the little issue that Sophie’s last memory as Persephone was just before someone tried to murder her.
Big picture: master her powers, get her memories back, defeat Persephone’s would be assassin, and save the world. Also, sneak into the Underworld to retrieve stolen property, battle the minions of Hades and Zeus, outwit psycho nymphs, slay a dragon, rescue a classmate, keep from getting her butt expelled from the one place designed to keep her safe …
… and stop kissing Kai, Prince of the Underworld.
My Ex From Hell is a YA romantic comedy, Greek mythology smackdown. Love meets comedy with a whole lot of sass in book one of this teen fantasy romance series. Compared to Kai and Sophie, Romeo and Juliet had it easy.
One minute, I was feeling all smug about my powers, the next, I caught sight of about a dozen Infernorators hovering just outside the fence like a firing squad. Yikes! I froze in terror as they advanced en masse toward me, reaching out their flaming tentacles.
Bless Theo and his wards. Their fire simply bounced harmlessly off the air above the fence. I really was in a giant protective shield. I smiled, thinly. My turn. I figured that since I had the upper hand, I should take these things out.
In my defense, it never even occurred to me that this was a two-way ward. In my head, it was all about me, me, me. So of course I’d be able to fire outwards.
Yeah … no. I sent my ribbons of light lashing out toward those bad boys. They hit the invisible shield at full speed, then bounced off it to rebound back at me.
That was the point at which I totally forgot how to control them and just yelped, wildly waving my hands around as I ducked and bobbed and tried not to trip over my own superpower.
A low laugh penetrated my fear. I glanced over, wide-eyed, to see Kai smirking from over by the back fence. For a second. The smirk quickly disappeared as I sent the creepers directly for him.
I will swear on a stack of bibles or whatever that I didn’t mean to take him out. It was instinctive. Better him a target than me.
“Duck!” I yelled feebly. He just glowered at me and put out his hand to stop them in their path. I might have felt like a busted bottle of Silly String, shooting these puppies out willy-nilly, but it was pretty impressive the way Kai had them twisting in place like that.
I stood there gaping until he growled, “Quit it” and I snapped back into action. I dropped my hands but that didn’t seem to blink the vines out of existence.
“Hurry up!” he snapped, the strain of holding them at bay wearing on him.
Honestly, I had no clue what to do. I tried to shoo them away from him. Less than successful. I only managed to redirect one toward a small sapling, which I then uprooted and used to conk him on the shoulder.
“Of all the useless …” he began.
“Who asked you to show up, anyway?” I shot back. Especially with me once again looking like Grimy, the eighth dwarf. I did the only thing I could think of at that point. Since I’d called the ribbons up with my energy, maybe I could draw them back in. I concentrated on pulling them back into me.
It worked. They dissipated in a rush. Their power flooded inside of me and knocked me back about twenty feet.
I landed like a rag doll. The wind was knocked out of me. I fluttered my eyes open several minutes later to find Kai frowning.
“That was stellar,” he commented. “Zeus and Hades won’t have to kill you. You’re a walking suicide mission.”
At the reminder of my nemeses, I turned my head back toward where the Infernorators had been.
“Forget it. The Pyrosim are gone,” he said, rubbing his shoulder.
“The tree didn’t help.”
“Oops. Sorry. You hid it well,” I said.
“I’m a god. I don’t show weakness. Around you,” he added, “that seems to be a survival skill.”
“Ha ha. Next time I’ll try and warn you if I’m getting ready to sprout. We could have a hand signal. I’ll bet the gods have great hand signals.”
“No.” Kai crossed his arms. End of discussion.
Or changing of subjects. “Why are you here?” I demanded, refusing his help as I struggled to sit up.
“I told you. Your whereabouts flash in my head.” “No. Here. Hope Park. What do you want?” “Answers. Why did you disappear on me?” “Someone tried to hurt me. Maybe it was you.” “It wasn’t me,” he stated darkly.
“Whatever. Theo didn’t know what fate was in store for me so he got me out of dodge.” “And you believe him?” “Do you have a better explanation for all this? Two days ago, I had no idea who I really was. Theo sure wasn’t thrilled to learn what happened when you kissed me.”
Kai smirked. “It was my kiss that set this off?”
“Yes. You’re very manly. Good for you.”
“I think it’s good for you,” he insisted.
Then he kissed me.